random thoughts ...

so let's see what's been going on lately ...
- i'm getting bigger. actually at my last doctor's appt, the nurse midwife said that i was right on the button. i was 22 cm at 22 weeks when she saw me but i feel like i'm bigger than i should be. but then everyone at work says that i'm incredibly small. i think it's because i'm in scrubs that don't accentuate my curves :p anyway, this second trimester has been good. definitely more energy than the first and then i get to be a lot more productive. i even get to work extra. speaking of working extra ...
- work's been crazy. we've gotten some pretty sad patients lately. i think the saddest part about them is that they're so young and all of this stuff happens to them that isn't their fault. one is riding his bike and gets hit by a drunk driver, and the other two are just passengers in the car and they get critically injured; one of the drivers was drunk and the other one got rear-ended. so it's been pretty sad at work lately.
- i miss hanging out with people and i enjoy it when i do. the past couple of weeks have been fun catching up with people. i had lunch with mina and dana one weekend and it's been forever since the three of us were together. our lives have been all on different paths lately but whenver we get together we still gel together. we're like glue. then i got to hang out with the kims, the o's, dexie, jimmy and kristin. from Mass to dinner to starbucks, didn't feel like we were there as long as we were. i think we were there until starbucks closed. time does fly when you're having fun. and both encounters either started or ended at st. liz. i think i find a comfort at that church for some reason. joey and i go to Mass there a lot and it's just comfortable. for some reason it makes me feel at peace. i can't place it but there's just something about it.
- we've been to the clinic a lot lately. i had to take my 3-hour glucose test one week and i passed (yay!) joey had a bad case of sore throat and the flu. the doctor said that usually 70% of people come in with a sore throat and it's nothing really. he looked at his throat and said "your throat looks like hell. you're going to need some antibiotics." guess he didn't fall in the 70%. then we went in for our monthly prenatal check-up. it's nice to be able to go to the clinic with someone; i always feel taken care of :p
anyway, i guess that's life in a nutshell. still other things going on but this is getting long :) talk to you later...

there's a bump ...

i woke up and there was this bump in front of me :p last week was the first time that some stranger came up to me and asked about my baby bump. so i think i finally look prego. and i bought some maternity clothes finally because my pants don't close :P anyawy, hope you all have a nice weekend!

He is Risen!

Happy Easter everyone! He is Risen!
at Mass today the priest kept emphasizing the importance of faith as Easter and the Resurrection are the foundations of Christianity. and then he started talking about the guards saying that there were robbers that somehow moved the body and it was funny because today was one of the first times that I ever noticed that the clothes for His head were folded in a different place. they must have been neat robbers. anyway, rejoice today. and every day for our Savior has blessed us with his Rising. Alleluia.

i thought of angie today at Mass. we were singing "Be not afraid" and it always reminds me of angie playing this in acton as we walked in the dark, through the fog, amidst all of the weird noises in the background, from screams to crying to reggatone and the look on her face when she continued to play and sing as loud as she could so we could make it to the room. it makes me smile. hope you're doing well ang. miss ya.

anyway, hope everyone had a beautiful day!

and the answer is ..........

we don't know :(

the baby was moving at the beginning of the ultrasound and then yawned and found a comfortable spot and went to sleep. the ultrasound tech tried to prod it to move but it was comfy and had its legs crossed indian style for the rest of the appointment. and thus, we have to wait until next time.

so far we've been getting that it's a girl and that she was trying to be a lady ... we'll see ...

san francisco was fun ... the weather was cool, definitely cool but sf is one place where you can where flip flops with a peacoat. i'll try to post pictures soon. ok folks, talk to you later.

so place your bets

so tomorrow is our ultrasound date and there are already bets on the sex of the baby. one of my co-workers, an older filipina lady who is our unit secretary had this theory.
benita: kay, i think you're having a boy
me: why?
benita: because you're pangit (which translates into ugly)
how sad! but she said it goes away, it's the hormones ... how nice huh?
then the other theory was that because my butt is getting bigger, i'm having a girl .... so which old wives' tale holds up? we'll see tomorrow ....

in other news, i saw my first open heart surgery on monday. it made me want to stop eating. first i saw the veins being harvested endoscopically, so they just used a small camera-esque thing instead of cutting all along the legs to harvest the vein. so it's pretty cool because the pt only has a tiny suture by the knee instead of a huge incision all along the leg. and then i got to see the poor, diseased heart - the pt had previously had a heart attack so you could see the necrotic part and plus you could see all of the fat too. and you saw it beating and the lungs breathing up and down on this open chest. and then they used this other machine called a cps in which they stop the heart and the cps acts as the heart and lungs of the patient while the ct surgeon performs most of the surgery. he was on the pump for 3 hours! then i saw the same vein that was harvested from the leg be sewn into the heart to bypass the coronary artery that was so damaged. then i got to directly recover the patient on our floor. the surgery lasted from 0700-1500 - a very long case - but i am now 3 more orientations away from being a heart nurse - scary!

i actually got saved on tuesday night too. both of my pts had transfer orders and low and behold, they found rooms for both of them by 2200. so i went to break after that and then helped settle in another pt for one of the other nurses. then i got report that i was getting a pt transferring from the VA but they were going to go to the cath lab first. sounded ok. then the house supervisor came up to our floor to find out who was getting this new transfer. i said it was me. and she said the pt is crashing in cath lab and they need the icu nurse. our charge nurse said that i can't go down there because i'm pregnant and may be exposed. so aileen, one of the other nurses, volunteered to go down. i thank God for being pregnant! when she got down there the pt's blood pressure was 30! they had to start cpr and then she was calling up so that we could mix some meds for him to try to get the blood pressure up. we had to mix 3 different bags of drugs! then the cardiothoracic attending called and said that this pt was going to need cps - the same machine they use for bypass surgery but was going to need it continuously on the unit and a balloon pump that pumps for the heart. there's only a few nurses that are certified to do it and so they had to pull another nurse that had an orientee, another one from the other floor and our charge nurse to go down to the crashing pt. so all together there were 4 of our nurses, the ct attending, a perfusionist, 3 residents and the cath lab nurse. they were gone from midnight until 3 am! and they came back up with the patient and all of the stuff and we were pumping blood and getting lines. it was nuts! if i wasn't pregnant, then i would have been the one coding the patient, doing the cpr and mixing the drugs! so aileen says that i owe her big time and if the baby's a girl, i have to name her aileen.

anyway, that's been my week .... we're going up to san francisco tomorrow so have a nice weekend everyone!

so i can't help it

... i need to blog about the lakers!
everyone knows i'm a laker fan - heck, our wedding was purple and gold! (this was purely coincidence, promise :)
but it's so fun to watch them nowadays! i was watching the game yesterday and was telling joey that they weren't playing well (even though they were up by 15 at the time!) but the way they play, especially that game against phoenix - it was so good. yeah defense may have been a problem considering they scored over 250 points between the 2 of them but still! it was an awesome game! even the commentators were like "please let these two teams meet in the playoffs because they are so exciting to watch!" i was so bummed when bynum went out, it was like, oh no! we're out of a big man for 8 weeks! but that turned out to be a blessing in disguise. kupchak said bynum going down was the reason they picked up gasol. wow. what a turn of events! and then the whole western conference went crazy trying to trade someone before the deadline. our trade was still the best because we essentially lost no "big names" for it. but anyway, so i love the lakers. but right now, i love them even more =)

there's only one ...

look ... there's only one.. and all ours =)

the baby was doing somersaults and backflips while trying to do the ultrasound and finally settled down for this shot. if you look above the head, baby was trying to wave =) crazy huh?

so i guess i should update a little. we're 15 weeks pregnant today. wow. 15 weeks. we found out on november 30th - brian's birthday actually. i volunteered to drive the girls to the liwanag banquet the next day so i would be the dd. they just thought that i wanted to be the dd, but i had other reasons. i was super hungry at banquet and francia asked if i was pregnant. i had to say no because i hadn't gone to the doctor yet. so that monday, i went to the doctor and they confirmed our pregnancy. i told my sister, my parents and his parents that week. i talked to my mom the next day (after the doctor's appt) and she said she had seen one of our ninongs from our wedding at Church and he was asking if i was pregnant and she said not yet. then she asked me if i was and i hesitated and i told her i would tell her next month. joey and i went to my parents for dinner the following day and we gave both sets of parents these pillows from hallmark that said "babies are precious gifts from God." my mom opened it and said "I knew it!" because i had hesitated in the conversation just the day before. i'm such a bad liar. We then went to Joey's parents' house. He said we were going to pick up mail. His mom's funny. We gave them the bag with the pillow in it. She opened and was like "oh, how cute - how come you guys didn't wait until Christmas to give it to me?" because she thought it was for Asher, Joey's baby nephew. Joey and I both kind of looked at her and then she said "Is this for you guys?" and we both started to laugh. Joey said "it wasn't THAT subtle." haha.

we wanted to try to tell everyone in person so we waited until we saw people to tell them instead of over the phone. We wanted to wait until our Christmas party to tell our circle of friends. But the week before our friends' Christmas party, Joey's sister, Cassie, Teresa, Rob, Lauren, Cel and Vincent came over. at that time, cassie, teresa and vince were the only ones who knew. so joey even asked me before they came over, what if someone says something? and i said, they won't. later in the evening, lauren was going to teach teresa how to stitch. i was sitting on the couch and lauren wanted teresa to sit next to her so she could see. so i moved to sit on the floor. so teresa says "you can't sit on the floor in your pregnant state." and i sat there ... on the floor ... with a pomegranate in my mouth as lauren and cel asked "WHAT? You're pregnant?" Joey was outside putting up Christmas lights so i didn't know where to look. so i sat there. on the floor. pomegranate in my mouth. and silence. so they repeated the question "You're pregnant?" and at that time, Joey walked back in the house and so they asked him "Kay's pregnant?" and he looks around and was like "who slipped?" teresa felt so bad. she's agreed to buy the baby's stroller since she slipped. she's so funny. anyway, so we still wanted to tell everyone at the Christmas party since that was the original agenda. so we asked them not to say anything and actually made them part of our plan. we all knew cel had me - thanks rich! and the plan was to describe 3 things about the Kris Kringle you had before you gave them your present so everyone could try to guess who you had by your clues. we told cel that her last clue had to be that "she's pregnant." everyone knew steph was pregnant so they would automatically think it was steph. so at the Christmas party, it was time to exchange presents. So cel gave some clues that would make sense for both me and steph:
1) this person has changed addresses this year
2) had a wedding at a country club
3) has a bun in the oven
steph was sitting right next to cel and was like oh - that's me! meanwhile ray, who really did have steph, was like, what the heck? did steph's name get put in twice?
but cel got up and took her present to me. and that's how everyone else found out. it was kind of funny.
again, we wanted to try to tell everyone in person. when i told joan, she almost fell down the stairs. we were at a dress shop and she wanted to get coffee. i said i can't get coffee but i can get tea. and she said 'why? are you pregnant?" as she proceeded to walk down the stairs. and i followed and nonchalantly said, 'yeah." and that's when she almost fell. she turned around and was like "are you serious?" and i said yeah. and she said at least it would make for a good story - her falling down the stairs when she found out i was pregnant.
anyway, this is really long. so i'll post more later. have a good one!

i stole ...

this from pia and fran ... thanks guys ... i guess this is the year in review that i never did ...
so much happened last year that it would be so hard to describe otherwise. i know this is two weeks late but better late than never =)
thanks for all the prayers this weekend guys ... please keep them up, it's a long road to recovery ... but with all of our prayers, hopefully it can be an easier road.

1. what did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?
got married =)

2. did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i don't think i made any... i never really do. maybe i should. not now though ;p

3. did anyone close to you give birth?
joey's gf had baby angie in march and frances had baby ethan in april and michelle had asher in september

4. what countries did you visit?
just mexico - but on two different occassions ;p

5. what would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
a side yard that's landscaped and a lcd tv to take the place of robert horry

6. what date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
september 1 - i wonder why =) i married the love of my life and was surrounded by my family and friends to share.

7. what was your biggest achievement of the year?
closing on the house the same week that we got married, talk about stress...

8. what was your biggest failure?
that's a tough one. maybe thinking about just me.

9. did you suffer illness or injury?
nothing serious.

10. what was the best thing you bought?
along with my hubby, our house.

11. whose behaviour merited celebration?
i think i agree with fran - definitely the firefighters

12. whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan. they're whores.

13. where did most of your money go?
the wedding and the house.

14. what did you get really, really, really excited about?
getting married, going on our honeymoon, getting the keys ...

15. what song will always remind you of 2007?
that stupid umbrella song

16. compared to this time last year, are you:
happier or sadder? happier.
older or wiser? older.
thinner or fatter? fatter.
richer or poorer? poorer

17. what do you wish you'd done more of?
spending quality time with people

18. what do you wish you'd done less of?
stress

19. how will you be spending CHRISTmas?
jumping from house to house to spend with family

20. did you fall in love in 2007?
i've been in love

21. what was your favorite tv program?
it would still have to be grey's anatomy ... and all laker games

22. do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
definitely.

23. what was the best book you read?
if you ask book club, i buy them all but i don't read them.

24. what was your favorite film of this year?
i don't think i watched enough. something with matt damon - i think we watched all his movies this year.

25. what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
turned 28. went to dinner with friends at grazianos. nothing big.

26. how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
scrubs, jeans and dresses to go to weddings =)

27. what kept you sane?
knowing i have someone to share every day of my life with =)
having family and friends with me through every step of the journey - it was a long twisted journey last year, ups and downs and lefts and rights but there was always someone there to pick me up and for that i am thankful - and sane

28. which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
derek fisher - he came back to la for his daughter's health. a father's love

29. tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007:
there is a dichotomy of life. with life, there's death. it was so weird. within the span of 24 hours there was both and it was one of the most gut-wrenching emotional turnarounds. to be sad and then to be happy but to just be there. for both. and try not to let one affect the other. keep strong. for there will again be happiness for all.

Merry CHRISTmas!

Hope everyone had a very Merry CHRISTmas! Hope it was filled with family, friends and love! I can't wait to upload pictures! I think that should be my new year's resolution -start uploading pictures again! anyway, hope everyone had a beautiful day and left their cares away :)

joey and i went to midnight Mass together and then went to Denny's with Joey and Ritanna and didn't sleep til 4 AM. got up to go and opened our stockings - we had to fill each other's stockings in the house (he even got a tea kettle to fit in mine - just kidding - he added a backpack and put a tea kettle inside) and then went to his parents' house to open presents, went to my parents' house to eat, watch the Lakers game and take lots of pictures, went back to Joey's parents to eat some more and play the Wii, went to Grish's restaurant to have Christmas with friends, then went back to Joey's parents' a third time to take family pictures. Then we finally got to go home and sleep. what a day! but filled with family and friends! MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone!

needed an update

so my blog was looking too brown for me. so i changed it. apparently reg is very protective over her template. sheesh. just kidding reg! anyway, i needed some color. and a picture. and some links. i think it's ok now. anyway, happy wednesday!

CHRISTmas is coming

CHRISTmas is coming all! let's not forget: Jesus is the reason for the season! Hope you're all having a good season!

so many things going on ...

there have been. last week i think was the craziest.
sun: work
mon: work
tues: book club
wed: work
thurs: bridal shower
fri: vince's bday
sat: liwanag 10-year gala
sun: work
mon: work
every night was full of something. and hence we've done no christmas shopping yet. actually, no. we have got the boys something. but that's it.
so i had yesterday off and just kind of vegged for the first time in a while. did some laundry. cooked dinner for the hubby. watched my retarded show that i'm addicted to - i'm kind of embarrassed to admit what i watch but i am so addicted. anyway, the past two days have been better. actually time to slow down and breathe.
i got to pick up our wedding dvd today. we tried to get it delivered to the house but since we're not on the map yet, they called us for directions on thursday. i called them back on friday and gave them directions. monday rolled around and they still hadn't delivered so i called them back. they said they would check and call me back and still nothing. so i called this morning and they asked if we coudl pick it up in ontario. so we finally have it =)
the liwanag gala was cool - very interesting to see everyone again. it really is amazing because praise and worship was awesome - i wish i knew the songs though. we were stuck in the front - thanks fran - and i didn't know the words. but all the same, it was still awesome.
so at banquet we saw ray and ann and milani. then on tuesday i saw them at costco.
the pablos: hi!
me: hey!
me: so where do you guys live:
p: in chino, you?
me: in college park
p: us too!
me: which one?
p: auburn
me: no way! that's the one i live in too! we're neighbors
they really live down the street! small world. yay we have neighbors besides the cows!
anyway, that's all for now. talk to you all later.

stuck

sometimes it's hard because there comes a point where you ask yourself where do you draw the line? faith and hope play a big part in this life. but working in the icu is so hard. we've had patients that have been in the hospital since september and october - specifically in the icu - and are so sick - their bodies rotting from the inside out or wasting away to a cachectic state yet their families still pray for a miracle, something that will help them turn the corner. as a clinician you want them to say it's ok to let them go because they really are rotting from the inside out. but in your heart, with all of your faith and hope, you do hope that they can somehow get better. how do you balance? that's when it's hard. where do we come in? and hence i get stuck.

life changes

so i was talking to j mo last night and we were talking about life changes. so many people around us are going through life changes right now and it's crazy how we're all caught up in it - some good, some bad, but definitely life changing. i always come to realize more and more how we can't ever take things for granted in this life. we do have to take one day at a time. and it's much easier when we have support.
in brighter news, thanksgiving and christmas are almost upon us! how fun! can't wait for the holidays! i think we're supposed to have a housewarming some day soon but that takes planning that i have yet to do =)

seeing grey

so i finally watched grey's anatomy this afternoon before i went to Mass and then work. i really love our DVR - i get to watch my grey's all over again. i didn't like one episode this season - the one when momma burke came and cristina wouldn't talk to her. but all of the rest of them have been great. so this afternoon i watched grey's and i cried like a baby. especially when bailey was talking to george about things being in black and white. marriage or any relationship can't be black and white - they have to sometimes be gray or grey in this matter. it's kind of where we're stuck and you have to see things from the other person's point of view. like bailey said, it takes two. now what side the other person sees is up to the other person. maybe they don't want to see gray. i don't know if i like the izzie/george storyline too much. i like that dr. hahn is back and there will again be a ct surgeon. and i don't know what i would do if i needed a heart transplant if i could take my child's - that must have been so hard. and that callie and cristina have somewhat bonded. i guess they have a common bond. wasn't sure if i liked the alex/ava thing because that was a bunch of adultery too. so i don't know if i like that part but so far it's been a good season. there's so many other things that i need to write about. congrats to dorothy and henry on their wedding! i have to post up pictures soon. and the housing market sucks right now but that's a whole different story. anyway, my break's done. talk to you later.

signs

so i've asked myself if i believe in signs ... not the mel gibson movie that i saw with the o's and dana years ago, but kind of like real signs. i guess i should explain. there's two instances right now that i can think of. i was at work last week and talking to one of the girls about going back to school, maybe i think i'm ready to start again. and then i went to pick up my mail at my parents' house and lo, and behold, there's a flyer from the ucla school of nursing for their applications to the bridge program. i brought the mail home and we've had a lot of mail that hasn't been sorted through so i told joey to take a look at it on his day off and to see what we need or what we can throw away. i told him i had a question for him and he says "you want to go back to school?" i said, "how did you know?" and he said that was the first thing at the top of the pile. we have to see - we're not sure yet because we need to think about family planning.
our next sign was a conversation with gomez the other week. he said he had a proposition for days. he asked if we would be interested in going on a mission trip to jamiaca - similar to what mustard seeds do. actually, going down to the mustard seed place in jamaica. i thought about it. and then joey and i were at Mass yesterday and the homily was about prayer and action. how we could pray and pray but if there was no action to what we were doing, then what are we really doing. so what do you think guys? anyone interested in going on a mission trip? we would have to do some fundraising but it would be "fun"draising! think about it and let me know

fires across the southland

it's crazy how one fire starts and then it just spreads. first it was malibu and agua caliente, and then irvine/ portola ranch / santiago canyon, and then ontario. i called my sister to see how they were and she said that they could see the flames prety far away so they were ok. apparently you could see the fires from our stairwell at work last night. then when i saw the news where there was a fire in ontario off of schaeffer i thought about our house (schaeffer is about 4 main streets away from us). so i called joey and he said that he didn't see or hear anything. so he took a stroll outside and it was mass wind and dust/ ash but he didn't see flames but all of the little trees that they planted in our neighborhood have blown over. as i was driving home this morning, the sky was completely gray - it was so nasty. and then the sky was red again - just like in lord of the rings - when legolas notices the red sky and says "blood has been shed this fortnight" he's so hot when he says that ... anyway, hopefully these things get contained because it's seriously getting hard to breathe.

these are a little delayed.... sorry

i haven't been posting on gbox lately because my hard drive crashed and we only have joey's laptop right now so i can only really go online when he's home. and when he closes, i don't really use the computer until after midnight and then i'm too tired to post hence the lack of pictures so that's why you've been seeing more pictures on this thing ...
this was joey's 29th birthday ... if you've been following along, we usually play poker. i think joey's last 3 birthdays have been poker parties, ever since he got chips at the penn house. so it was no different this year, we played poker, if you lost you played wii in the loser lounge, and then there was flip cup during the intermission so you could get lightly tossed before playing the second game. i really sucked at that game so i don't know if i'll ever play that one again =)

hawaii in a nutshell

our week in waikiki ....
weddings and birthdays in paradise ... good times ...
these pictures posted all out of order but i think you get the picture ...

congratulations!

Congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Rob Duran!




Welcome to the club!