wine galore

i'm sitting in joey's grandma's back room and am surrounded by liquor. Saturday's theme is "A Night in Naples" and there's 10 different kinds of wine but there is also 2 different kinds of tequila, 2 different kinds of rum, vodka, jack, beer and smirnoff. i told grandma i wanted to try all of the different wine and she said "good girl." i would pass out. maybe i'll grow an appreciation for it.

showers galore

a big thanks to all the ladies that threw the bridal shower on saturday - it was awesome! there was so much food and the chocolate fountain was so yummy and there was purple and gold everywhere - i loved it! this was like wedding shower games for the advanced because they were tough! but everyone had a good time and i can't thank our bridesmaids enough! next up is joey's side of the family plus the couple friends. and then my co-workers are throwing one for us the week after - then the showers are done and the big day approaches! still so much to finish but it's in the works. anyway, i haven't posted pix from the shower but my wonderful matron-of-honor aka my sister did

gabe.gbox.org

it's under the photo gallery section.

have a good day!

my civic duty

so i finished jury duty today. i've been on jury duty since last wednesday. we sat in the box until today and we settled the case today. it was a civil suit and we were just awarding monies. i'm actually happily surprised that we ruled the way we did. i thought it was going to take a while longer for the 12 of us to agree on such things. our forewoman lady was really pushy - she came into jury duty stating she loved jury duty and she felt like she was on vacation. apparently this is the 4th time she's been on a case and she actually calls if she doesn't get her notice - how weird! the plantiff was asking for $1.5 million - from medical bils (past and future) and pain and suffering (past and future). i think they were a little disappointed when we awarded $27,074 - and $11K was for medical bills alone. that's too bad really because a third is going to the attorney. what a waste of time - the accident happened 5 years ago. anyway, six and a half more weeks til i become mrs. lopez - ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

so the countdown begins

eight more weeks until the big day ...
so many things done, but so many more things to do
A BIG THANK YOU TO THE O'S - the most awesome friends and paper people ever with even more patience than an elephant (do elephants have patience?) when i saw the printed version that they had to work with and that they had to individually cut each one - i would have strangled myself. you two are wonderful!
so now all the other nitty gritty stuff comes along and that process has begun too ... so it's ok, all is good. mark said he was surprised i wasn't stressed. i said i don't really get stressed. ha!
had breakfast with mark and dana this morning and that was awesome. we were making fun of dana because she's so sappy now. haha. just kidding. but you know you are. hehe. it's always good to hang out after so long and just kind of continue like there wasn't even a gap, an understanding between friends of different ways of thinking but so much to the core of their very being that we know how they work and why they would feel the way that they feel. it's nice.
anyway, had more dance lessons today. i got really dizzy spinning but all in all i think it was a good productive lesson.
we finished all of the pictures to give to gabe so we can check that off.
i told joey's mom that i didn't want lingerie at my shower and she said that i had to have some - that's what a "personal" shower is for. she wants to get me the crotchless panties - she's crazy. or she suggested the swing to go in the poker room - i said yeah, it would definitely be a "poker" room. she said that we had to be creative and open to ideas in the beginning with sex. i'm telling you - it's so weird having this conversation with your mother-in-law.
anyway, our new nephew has a name - asher albert. we get to go to his shower tomorrow. i hope he comes on time or late because if he shows up 10 days early i don't think i can make it to the birth and i'd be missing one bridesmaid.
my first nephew is now 7! wow 7! he turns 7 on 7/7/07. i told my brother to buy the lotto because today could be his lucky day.
anyway, the next couple weeks are going to fly by. we still have a couple things left to do with the loan that we should fax in next week and then we have to fill out the papers that the escrow officer sent us this week and hopefully we can close sometime late july / early august. we're hoping the latter so it's easier on the pocketbook with all the finishing payments with the wedding.
there's so much stuff going on and it's all so exciting. scary. but exciting and new. and we've only just begun ...

wow

as i was talking to joey we said in two months we'll be opening presents =)
anyway, just wanted to say hi! since i haven't in a while because everything's been so busy lately ...
on this week's agenda ...
work and work ...
stuffing and mailing ...
food tastings ...
breakfast / lunch dates ...
dance lessons ...
nephew's birthday party
new nephew's baby shower ...
brother's birthday ...
more work and jury duty calling ... blah ....
and it's so hard to do in the flippin heat.
i usually always wear a long sleeve shirt under my scrubs but yesterday and today i couldn't do it because it's so flippin hot...
anyway, we'll continue at another time. have to go to my floor.

day by day

so it's been a hard couple of weeks lately ...
my dad was in the hospital last week ...
chest pain and then he was admitted to the hospital for 3 days
he had another angioplasty with 3 additional stents placed ...
the last time this happened was in November 2005
my sister made a joke that that was 2 months before her wedding and now this happened three months before mine ... at least i'm the last one to get married.
so we celebrated father's day on sunday and pa was able to go out to dinner with us and everything
sunday was a long day ... went to Mass and then went to Joey's family's lunch for father's day, came home and got ready to go to my dad's father's day dinner at cheesecake and then went straight to work ... talk about being tired ...
anyway, lots of stuff to say in so little time ... thanks for the prayers everyone for my dad and now he's actually back at work today.

dana and i were talking last night and i carried on the same conversation with joey. i told them (during our seperate conversations) that i knew that even before joey and i officially started dating that if we started dating, i knew i was done. i knew that if we decided that we were going to go out, i would be with him for the rest of my life. we both knew - we had dated before and we knew what we were looking for and if we made that decision to be together, that was it. and looking back, we both knew. and we're happy with the love we found. so yes, you can know right away. scary huh? but exciting.

is he really leaving?

is Kobe really leaving the Lakers?
for real?
I don't know how to take this ...
the team that supported you durung your whole rape trial?
the team that took a risk for an 18 year old kid?
and then you sell them out on the radio?
after 10 years?
i'm supporting my team, but not this player ...

so much to say

and so little time ....
maybe tomorrow ....
so much going on ...
we took our engagement photos last week and i'm waiting for the proofs
we tasted lots of cakes and decided on our cake ...
4 tiers .... that's a lot!
we signed our papers! yay!
but wayyyyy scary ....
couldn't really concentrate while doing so ....
and joey was more than his quiet self
so scary ...
went to brenda's bday ...
we watched chuck liddel lose ...
had a bad case of stomach something ...
had a bbq at lola's ...
this week we have to finish planning our honeymoon ...
michelle's church ceremony and shower ...
lara's bday ...
figuring out invites ....
and the worst part ....
budgeting ....
why does it always have to come to budgeting????

what a weekend

Grish and Steph got married! yay!
and we put down our deposit! Ahhhh!!! i'll blog more about that one later...

didn't we almost have it all

what a title
this is the first time that i've watched grey's anatomy live in a long time
and every time i do, it makes me cry
and this one made me cry on all levels
geez ....
burke's vows made me cry
bailey not getting chief resident made me cry
izzie - george - callie thing made me cry
meredith - derek made me cry
everything made me cry
i'm a big cry baby
but that lexie grey is probably meredith's half-sister. that's my thinking.
but what about all the other characters?
did burke really leave?
where is george going to go?
what is bailey going to do not being chief resident?
so many questions ...
but i guess we'll see addison on private practice ....
and find out the rest next season
wow ... already season 4 next season ...

dead phone

i guess i should have let you guys know this before but my phone is / has been dead for a week.
i had to re-activate my other phone because my current phone cannot charge and my upgrade doesn't happen until october and my old chargeri can't find so i had to order but it still hasn't come in after a week. so if ur texting me, i'm not getting it. i do check my voicemail though but if i don't know ur number by heart, and u don't leave it, i won't be calling u back until i get my old charger back. if anything, call joey and hopefully he'll relay the message. all right. have a good one.

what a girl needs

so i couldn't sleep yesterday because those stupid policies kept bugging me
so i went to sleep at 11 and woke up at 1 and kept researching but i think i was still right
anyway, i've been sick lately and i was really sick on monday night that i had my own tissue box with me the whole night and finished it throughout my shift - it was the kind with lotion so my nose isn't too red
anyway, i was supposed to work extra tuesday night because we were short and we need the money but after monday's terrible experience i took myself off
when i talked to joey, he was very supportive and we went on a date - on a tuesday.
we went to outback for dinner - had some nice comfort food of cheddar fries, pasta and meat - and talked about his beloved Robert Horry getting suspended. then we walked over to the mall and did some shopping. we're looking for a new suit for him for michelle's wedding. and then we went to the movies. we watched fracture with anthony hopkins and ryan gosling - ryan gosling is sooooo hot. plus he has that southern twang. and he's a really good guy in the movie. anthony hopkins is very intelligent and the movie is very good. recommended. i had been venting and crying all day long and we were in the car and i said "thanks honey"
Joey: "for what"
me: for today
for listening to me tell the same story ten times
for letting me cry
for being you ...
joey: you needed it
me: i know i did and i appreciate you knowing that ... and then i started crying again ...
joey looks at me and i say
me: "don't worry, these are happy tears"
he smiles...
what more could a girl ask for?

i really hate

feeling dumb ...
and it bothers me that when given an answer they tell me "it's in the policy
so i looked up the policy and guess what? it's not in the policy!
arrrgggghhhh .....
really frustrating
my pt was on a temporary dialysis machine that we have to manage
a ventilator
2 drips (continuous IV's that we have to titrate) to keep his blood pressure up
one to control his heart rate
another for sedation
another for pain
another for clotting
another for his blood sugar
total parental nutrition and lipids
something to look at is heart fluid status
so there's 12 IV pumps in my room along with all of this other stuff
and i manage everything until 0500
then the one thing - the dialysis thing - clots off at 0500
and when the docs come in at 0630 that's the one thing they notice
not that everything else is stable
just that one thing made it seem like i did nothing the rest of the night ...
i hate it

defense mechannisms

i've seen them put up a lot lately - not only with myself but with other relationships around me.
sarcasm?
blame?
anger?
denial?
avoidance?
these are all the bad ways to deal with them and this is what i see.
i want to be able to have good coping mechanisms
acceptance
progression
and all that good stuff but it's so hard when i see so much of everything else
weird.

Happy Nurses Week

Make sure you wish all the nurses in your family

HAPPY NURSES WEEK!!!

Hosana

Pia made me cry at Mass yesterday. Choir was small - Jimmy, Fil, Gil, Jerome, Pia and I - and Annika too. But the Hosana in the Highest is my favorite Mass part because of the little solos that Pia /Dexie and Fil do that resonate and linger. The sounds are just so beautiful. And Saturday when I was standing next to Pia and heard her sing it - it was so beautiful in my ear. It made me realize that God has truly blessed me with His love and I see and hear Him through these people and their musical talents. And they will be there to sing that same Hosana at our wedding. and that day it will probably make me cry even more. I can't wait

it doesn't get old

with all the worries and all of the stresses in life right now, words that i never get tired of hearing

" i know it will be ok 'cuz we're in it together"
" i love you"

I'm thankful God has blessed me so much. There's a couple things that are happening right now that I don't fully understand and I know one day that I will. But God has blessed me thus far that I will indeed trust in Him.

quote of the day

"you are my penis fish"

Dr. Izzie Stevens
- Grey's Anatomy 4/26/07

getting back on track

ever since wed night when we withdrew care on my pt, i've been very doubtful of my nursing skills. is there something i could have done more? after he had died i was bawling like a baby. i was crying in the bathroom and joey called me and i told him what had happened. he asked "did you do anything that made him die?" i said "no" and he said that it wasn't my fault. and that's true. he had been sick for so long. anyway, monday night i had a neuro pt. neuro pts scare me because they can change so fast. he kept complaining of a headache and i called the dr to make sure because headahces are classic signs of increased intracranial pressure. doc said both his head scans were negative. i called him again to make sure 2 hours later and he said the same thing. i had given the pt vicodin and two doses of morphine within 3 hours and his headache still wasn't going away. and then he threw up. and then he felt much better. the rest of the night was pretty unveventful but more headache and i told the doc and he said they were ok with pain because he got whacked in the head. but everything else was normal. he was answering appropriately, moving all extremities, his pupils were reactive. even when the docs came in at 0630 their assessment was the same. and then when i came back last night they said at 0800 he became unarousable. they placed a drain in his head and sure enough there was fluid in his brain that needed to be drained - that was causing the headache. i knew there was something else wrong. so i asked my charge nurse and she asked if i documented everything and i had. we checked the neuro doc's assessment at 0630 and pt was fine at that point - his assessment was the same as mine. i gave report at 0715 and he was ok. so much can happen in that span of time. but it just made me doubt myself. the same doc that was there wed night to pull the vent on my pt had this pt this morning. he was so nice. he asked me how i was doing after that night because he saw me crying like a baby. it was very thoughtful and we kind of tried to figure out how we could have made it easier. he's a first year resident and he's learning well. he said "those 45 minutes are going to be instrumental in my career." me too.

Sukob

so I found this on someone else's blog. it didn't happen for them so I hope it doesn't happen for us either. Superstitions and faith just shouldn't mix. I truly believe that marriage is a triangle - our relationship, with God as the other point of our triangle. and we're working on it and it's been so beautiful to have him ask what time we're going to Mass and where and talk about what we've been praying about. I still want to watch the movie though ;p

anyway, here's what it means ...

http://aboutmyrecovery.com/2006/08/02/sukob-a-movie-about-superstition/

Sukob – a Superstitious Belief

No I haven’t watched Sukob but my daughter thinks it’s a more horrific film than The White Lady. Notice how the Philippine Movie industry is spewing Filipino film horror genre like its Asian counterparts? As the movie’s title (“Sukob”) states, the movie is about all the horrible things that happen when two siblings are married within the same year.
Well fellow bloggers, my sister B and I married on the same year, 1985. Another sister , M got hitched in 1986 and another sister, L in 1987. And guess what? We all encountered marital problems like most marriages. But how would I know it back then? The year 1985 was originally reserved for me. Oh yes, we had to book our wedding dates in advance as my father is overly superstitious. Dad was a typical traditional Filipino father. Also, we wanted to play it safe. M wanted to get married in 1985 as well but gave in to me because I was the older sister. Besides , Butch and I were already steadies for 7 years. M and her fiancee just met that year. M thought we should get the wedding date of May 1985. I had seniority and first priority. One day in October 1985, B suddenly announced her wedding plans for November 1985. M and I were furious.
How could you? Don’t you know one of us will have bad luck? I cried.
M protested “ I gave in to Noemi because I didn’t want both of us to be married the same year”
B argued “That’s just a superstition!”
Shock and disappointment was our initial reaction . B remained adamant. She pushed through with her wedding plans and got married in November 1985. My father forgot all about the superstition because he suffered a stroke a few days after my sister asked permission.
If B didn’t insist on marrying in 1985, her wedding date would have been slated for 1987. Imagine 2 more years. And L would have protested too. That’s what happens when there are 4 sisters in the family. How can one predict wedding dates anyway?
Twenty-one years later, my attitude towards superstitious beliefs changed. Superstitious beliefs are so negative and it means one does not even have faith in God. If one continues to foster negative vibes about marriage, then it will lead that way. I had to remove the “sukob” belief in order to lead a positive attitude of my married life. I have learned that a marriage is about imperfect people doing their best to nurture and minister in love. Caring, long-term commitment, integrity, togetherness and maintaining a positive focus are qualities of character that foster lasting love. God is also the center of our married life. He controls the details of our life and we lift our problems and plans to Him. Of course, I only knew this much later in life after much pain and trials.
Inspite of my initial disappointment, I learned to let it go. M forgot about it. May all the sisters in the world continue to live in love and understanding. Pooh “sukob”. It’s not true.